Hello, and welcome to my page! I am a member of Southampton University Canoe Club. Contrary to popular belief, I wasn't stolen from a village hall in South Wales: I wanted out of that horrid place, away from the hordes of toddlers who kicked and threw me about making my life a misery. I managed to escape with an adoring group of students who promised me a life of luxury.
And what did I get?
Here are a few of my hobbies
2018 – October
Clive returns to Perranporth, the sleepy town of Porthtowan did not appreciate the company of such a rowdy bear
The website www.isclivealive.com/ is published, to help concerned members of the public keep up to date with his movements.
2012 – March
Clive gets attacked with an Ice Axe
Clive goes to the Alps and attempts some new extreme sports, detailed in this video.
1999 – Spring
Clive suffers a huge medical setback after being repeatedly run over by a Ford minibus and kayak trailer.
Clive features in a runner-up duo team at the Holme Pierrepont Student Rodeo. One of the highlights of his kayaking career
Clive narrowly escapes major bio-hazard damage during the infamous ‘White Russian’ minibus trip to the River Usk.
Clive survives several descents of such quality rivers as the Usk, Dee, and Etive. Riding shotgun in a Perception Pirouette.
Clive’s dismembered head is found floating in a block of ice in the LSU pool, the reasoning behind this is still unclear.
Clive is dismembered for the first time and sent back to his guardians in the post, he required a fur transplant when he was reunited with his limbs.
‘One bit was wrapped in tin foil and turned up at the Freshers fair. I thought I’d been given an old kebab and chucked it, only to then have to rifle through the bin!’ – Iain Penketh
1993 – Summer
Clive is kidnapped again and is taken to the Alps where he endured a season of torture too horrific to detail
1993 – Scotland
Clive’s ears are found stapled to a board with a ransom note attached, this became the first of many kidnappings.
Clive acquires a wetsuit from the Tiki shop in Braunton, he is also given his own custom fibreglass kayak, this has sadly been lost.
Clive is found at Llangynidr village hall, he asked to join the club and so we took him back to Southampton.
‘Contrary to popular belief, I wasn’t stolen from a village hall in South Wales: I wanted out of that horrid place, away from the hordes of toddlers who kicked and threw me about making my life a misery. I managed to escape with an adoring group of students who promised me a life of luxury.’
– Clive T. Bear